Saturday, August 1, 2009

FORGIVENESS

To begin this post today, I have come to the realization that Bryan Adams is my best artist of all time. Spending more time indoors recently, has allowed me much more time to listen to music, read notes and all that stuff and I could not get over how good Bryan Adams is. I have always known him to be good, just did not realize he was my best artist of all time...



Anyways to the reason for today's posting...The word for the day is FORGIVENESS. I have searched many places for what forgiveness is, and this is what I think describes it best.
"It is the process of concluding resentment, indignation or anger as a result of a perceived offense, difference or mistake, and ceasing to demand punishment or restitution.




Many a times in our lives, we are wronged by someone we had so much trust and confidence, and even even more so, sure they would not hurt us and in truth, they are the most likely to hurt you and hurt you enough to not want to forgive them. Hurt you enough to hold resentments towards yourself, others and those who hurt us. That we have been hurt by these people makes forgiving seem so difficult and scared. It makes the bibles principal teachings of forgiveness seem so complicated. In the bible, it says, “But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also.” Luke 6:27-29 (NIV). Also, it says, "TO ERR IS HUMAN, and TO FORGIVE IS DIVINE."

To make forgiveness seem easy, I forbid myself to do. It takes a lot to forgive. A lot of sacrifice and denial but in truth, you are better off forgiving someone than holding the resentment to yourself. A key part of forgiveness is that you free up your mind and I can guarantee you a happier life. Studies show that people who forgive are happier and healthier than those who hold resentments. The first study to look at how forgiveness improves physical health discovered that when people think about forgiving an offender it leads to improved functioning in their cardiovascular and nervous systems. Another study at the University of Wisconsin found the more forgiving people were, the less they suffered from a wide range of illnesses. The less forgiving people reported a greater number of health problems.

More important though is the fact that forgiveness can be learned. People who are taught how to forgive are found to be less angry, feel less hurt, are more optimistic, become more forgiving in a variety of situations, and become more compassionate and self-confident. Forgiving people and letting them know they are forgiven is also an integral step. Letting them know they have been forgiven helps them forgive themselves, change their otherwise saddening, regrettable life to one filled with the joy of the weight you have lifted off their shoulder.

The last step in forgiving is to make sure you not only forgive but you forget. Forgetting would require you to act good and 'normally' to the one you have forgiven, giving them a chance to prove they are changing or have changed. More on the note of FORGETTING later, though most believe these two, go hand in hand and hence the quote, "FORGIVE AND FORGET".

Have a great day and watch out for my 50th post as this is my 49th post since I started this blog...It will be a special post.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hmmm...I wonder who or what inspired this post..;)

Unknown said...

There are different values that encompasses the ideal you. I will, through the course of the next 10 postings, be writing on some of these values...Trust, Faith, Tolerance, Endurance, Communication and many others...Please follow me on this thoughtful expedition