K, I just thought its been a while.Before I start, I have a room to sublet for the summer at 2833 Baycrest Drive, Ottawa ON. Contact me through email-dazedfaze2000@hotmail.com or Facebook for details. Someone once said,"If you have made mistakes, there is always another chance for you. You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call "failure" is not the falling down, but the staying down". I have made in life, numerous mistakes, many that can be called folly but I have chosen this day to wrong my rights...I have wronged a woman I loved and cherish dearly in many ways but one.I am sincerely sorry and apologetic, though I know no amount of these will fix my failings...I have hurt myself, beyond belief and most importantly, I lost the only one who sincerely truthfully loved, cherished and adored me, all because of my pride, ego, selfish, flirtatious being. Being going for counsellings for a couple of weeks now, and if there is one thing I have learned, it is to forgive myself.
A lot has happened to make me question who exactly a friend is.Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each other, often to the point of altruism. Their tastes will usually be similar and may converge, and they will share enjoyable activities. They will also engage in mutually helping behaviour, such as exchange of advice and the sharing of hardship. A friend is someone who may often demonstrate reciprocating and reflective behaviours. Yet for many, friendship is nothing more than the trust that someone or something will not harm them.
Now knowing this, I can say I have very few friends, which is a good thing, because I thought I had none. I live life with a principle, the only thing I finally think I got right in all of my many life principles: Never except good from people all the time, when people acted in ways you wouldn't "normally" expect them to, I am not surprised, I feel as though that is how they are suppose to act. When they are good, I am appreciative of this and never forget it. I do not expect people to be nice, I expect acts of wickedness, so when I see good, I give such people utter respect and honour, but hey, you cares what you think.
I will do all I can to, not possibly turn around situations I have wronged,but to help be launchpad for a new start.
Ego is something I have walked around with for most of my life. I have been made conscious of it, but I acted like it wasn't there. I have lost all of it now, so I can say to you all, there is nothing you can do to down me anymore. I will walk around, in the middle of your preying eyes, lashing tongues, gnashing teeth, and clawing fingers.
I have to take summer school. I do not know where the finances will come from but it will be done. NSBE introduced a program called the "4.0 GPA" and I will be participating in this from this summer and I will show that I can be competent academically once again.
This is a fresh new start, a new beginning, new awakening. It is one I am looking forward to with new aplomb.
Special mention to a couple of people who have been of great help in recent times...Dj EAI, Michael Samuel, A-town, Don 1, Lumi Gbagbe, Nosa, Obi, Larry Ola, Osasu, Piriye and anyone else I forgot to mention. Your help will never be forgotten and you can be sure to be rewarded by the one has rewards in its multitude.
