Like a midsummer day, the sun shone
One of those days you wish you had a clone
A clone to go around and increase your chances
Chances of meeting that one beautiful one
The damsel who would make every night the beginning of a new day
I set out to check on the clay I had molded yesterday
Went down on my knees to touch it and see if its strong now
A beach ball came across and struck my head...
as I looked up to see where it came from
The sun casts its glow in my eyes
like the scale in Saul's eyes
My sight was hindered, but not enough for me to know that an exciting figure was approaching me
The closer the figure approached me, the better my sight.
Emancipating in my view was the lady I had dreamed about for nights now
She was beautiful, wonderfully and skillfully crafted
Skin toned like the colour of the sand on which she walked
Her walk was like that of a goddess, gently moving
Gracious was the way she carried herself
Delirious was the way I felt
She would come close
close enough I could see all of her
not in anyway deterred by the rays of the sun
Im thinking,"With her, I will never mourn"
She looks me straight in the eyes
I knew she knows no lies
Flawless were her thighs
Oh, they were such a beautiful sight
With her right hand, she held my jaw
raised my face as if to make me get up
Sadly I could not rise to her
Numb my feet had become
Nimble I wish my fingers would be
So I could stroke the fullness of her hair
the caress the smoothness of her skin
the curves of her waist
the parabola of her behind.
In the lost space of my mind,
a voice began to set in the distance
Gentle the voice, soothing it was
I could hear her say,
"Sorry about the ball"
In silence, I said," I know"
Then she said," I meant to throw a stone at your head"
To be continued....
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Womanhood
What is gender superiority? Should I exist? Do women have to fight for equality( in some extreme case by some people, to be superior)? Why cant men and women share their advantages and disadvantages for the good of mankind? By how much is our inner consciousness in line with patriarchy? I have always known the good of women but never has this light been shed on this. We, both men and women, need women for our every existence and survival. It has become the most simple rule of survival today, just like biology will tell you basic survival instinct: Survival of the fittest. Who is the fittest?
A woman provides essentials and attempts to resolving problems.She is psychologically satisfying. Setbacks ensues from the mismanagement of her gifts and failing to cultivate the mother within. Deeply rooted in Chinua Achebe's novel, " THINGS FALL APART", (which I am acting a play on. Oct 2nd at Kailash Mital Theatre, 6PM), I have come to realize something. WE NEED WOMEN MORE THAN WE ACT LIKE WE DO.
Okonkwo, both macho and sexist, is permanently in a state of denial about his feminine side, even as he unconsciously searches for his alien mother. Substituting his favourite daughter for her as a palliative, he finally thrives when he finds the maternal source: when circumstances force him to live with his mother's relations. Remember these lines from the book or except to hear it in the forthcoming play: " A man belongs to his fatherland when things are good and life is sweet. But when there is sorrow and unhappiness, he finds solace or refuge in his motherland. Your mother is there to protect you". Why is it that when a child gets beaten by his father, he runs to his mother's arms? Why? Once Okonkwo abandons his motherland and journeys back to his fatherland, his life takes a turn for the worse, ending his life tragically, after been confronted with the harsh face of colonialism, unprotected by the maternal principles. I believe that like Okonkwo, most men, no matter how macho we appear to be, are unconsciously waiting for women to release them from the trap of fatherland, the suicidal trappings holding them captive in their father's house. Even the legendary tortoise, in dire straits, always finds a way out of his dilemma. The men have turned turtle, they need the maternal principle to help to turn them back up, to reinstate them, so that all can act concertedly for the progress of mankind. Now even for those who believe in "juju" or as some will call it, "african magic", it reflects the ethics of dependency-the belief that the all-powerful mother, with her supernatural juju, will make everything all right. This cannot more be echoed than when I cast a female for Okagbue in the upcoming play, or the naming of Ezeani, the goddess of the soil in the book. How coincidental. To therefore accomplish this feat, women need extra empowerment. Where best does this empowerment come from, if not from men who run to them in times of weakness? Even more sadly for the majority is that women rarely question female self-effacement, accepting the idea that men should be supported for the commonweal. The lesson that needs to be passed on is that a strong community is born only when support is mutual, and strong women are not chased to the periphery. I think in truth, men fear the secret ways women manage to survive in spite of great hardships. This is a gift they are naturally endowed with and we all must come to realize this. Women must come to appreciate this and men must understand this, knowing well that in times of good, remember to see the good in a woman so you can run into her bossom when times are bad. Even in literary terms, or with the present day, the most hardcore male or bonafide player, who is untouched by the inner feelings of emotions from a female ( otherwise too), will always have his masculinity dampened by what most call "woman like nature". Yes, I know what I am saying. Moments of teardrops, flashes of romantic episodes, inklings of a females influence on your being. We all must learn to see the light cast by womanhood. We all must love women for all they are, for even in the darkest moments, they are capable of good. It is their most basic instinct.
Inspiration from the following:
AFRICAN WOMAN PALAVA by Ogunyemi Chikwenye
THINGS FALL APART by Chinua Achebe
A poster at the CUSA office: A WOMAN'S PLACE IS IN HER STUDENT UNION
A woman provides essentials and attempts to resolving problems.She is psychologically satisfying. Setbacks ensues from the mismanagement of her gifts and failing to cultivate the mother within. Deeply rooted in Chinua Achebe's novel, " THINGS FALL APART", (which I am acting a play on. Oct 2nd at Kailash Mital Theatre, 6PM), I have come to realize something. WE NEED WOMEN MORE THAN WE ACT LIKE WE DO.
Okonkwo, both macho and sexist, is permanently in a state of denial about his feminine side, even as he unconsciously searches for his alien mother. Substituting his favourite daughter for her as a palliative, he finally thrives when he finds the maternal source: when circumstances force him to live with his mother's relations. Remember these lines from the book or except to hear it in the forthcoming play: " A man belongs to his fatherland when things are good and life is sweet. But when there is sorrow and unhappiness, he finds solace or refuge in his motherland. Your mother is there to protect you". Why is it that when a child gets beaten by his father, he runs to his mother's arms? Why? Once Okonkwo abandons his motherland and journeys back to his fatherland, his life takes a turn for the worse, ending his life tragically, after been confronted with the harsh face of colonialism, unprotected by the maternal principles. I believe that like Okonkwo, most men, no matter how macho we appear to be, are unconsciously waiting for women to release them from the trap of fatherland, the suicidal trappings holding them captive in their father's house. Even the legendary tortoise, in dire straits, always finds a way out of his dilemma. The men have turned turtle, they need the maternal principle to help to turn them back up, to reinstate them, so that all can act concertedly for the progress of mankind. Now even for those who believe in "juju" or as some will call it, "african magic", it reflects the ethics of dependency-the belief that the all-powerful mother, with her supernatural juju, will make everything all right. This cannot more be echoed than when I cast a female for Okagbue in the upcoming play, or the naming of Ezeani, the goddess of the soil in the book. How coincidental. To therefore accomplish this feat, women need extra empowerment. Where best does this empowerment come from, if not from men who run to them in times of weakness? Even more sadly for the majority is that women rarely question female self-effacement, accepting the idea that men should be supported for the commonweal. The lesson that needs to be passed on is that a strong community is born only when support is mutual, and strong women are not chased to the periphery. I think in truth, men fear the secret ways women manage to survive in spite of great hardships. This is a gift they are naturally endowed with and we all must come to realize this. Women must come to appreciate this and men must understand this, knowing well that in times of good, remember to see the good in a woman so you can run into her bossom when times are bad. Even in literary terms, or with the present day, the most hardcore male or bonafide player, who is untouched by the inner feelings of emotions from a female ( otherwise too), will always have his masculinity dampened by what most call "woman like nature". Yes, I know what I am saying. Moments of teardrops, flashes of romantic episodes, inklings of a females influence on your being. We all must learn to see the light cast by womanhood. We all must love women for all they are, for even in the darkest moments, they are capable of good. It is their most basic instinct.
Inspiration from the following:
AFRICAN WOMAN PALAVA by Ogunyemi Chikwenye
THINGS FALL APART by Chinua Achebe
A poster at the CUSA office: A WOMAN'S PLACE IS IN HER STUDENT UNION
Saturday, September 5, 2009
9 Ways to Make Your Relationship Last
I would very much like to see people work things out, if they can. I have come to realize that if couples try one or more of the following 9 suggestions, they may be able to keep their relationship from hitting the rocks in the first place.
1. Delineate "yours," "mine," and "ours." If you have finances that should be placed in each of these three categories (for example, you have an inheritance and he has a savings account he accumulated before the marriage, and you also have a checking account to which you both contribute), have an upfront conversation about those assets and what belongs to whom. Moreover, talk about your time away from "together" activities, like he wants to bowl with the guys on Tuesday nights and you want to attend your yoga class on Wednesday. Respect these important delineations. Doing so will make the relationship stronger.
2. Carve out time to be together. Sure, you're busy working and attending meetings, but how important are those things if your relationship falls apart? Make time to do things together that you both enjoy. This could be anything from grocery shopping to taking in a movie. Take regular vacations together -- at least a couple of long weekends and, better yet, a couple of long vacations (more than a weekend jaunt). Commit to a weekly date night and make it as unbreakable as that all-important staff meeting at work.
3. Take care of yourself. Spend time every day on your appearance and your physical well-being. Work out regularly, eat healthy, and stay fit. Not only will your partner like looking at you, but you'll feel better about yourself.
4. Make sure communication goes both ways. Many relationships fail because of misunderstandings. Effective communication skills are necessary if your relationship is going to survive. If there is a hint or vibe that your partner is disconnected or you are unhappy about something, do not ignore those signals or feelings. Approach your mate and suggest an open discussion. You may be frustrated, angry, or hurt and so may he or she, but always stay calm and reasonable. Your goal should be to resolve differences, and the only viable way of doing so is through open and direct communication.
5. Criticize gently. Don't judge too harshly. If you criticize, do so in the same way you would want others to criticize you. Be kind and considerate.
6. Never stop courting one another. Gifts, compliments, and a loving embrace go a long way, especially when they are a surprise. Send unexpected greeting cards, slap a Post-It note where you know your mate will find it, keep those flowers coming in a "just because" way. Treat your partner with the same courtesies you did when you were dating. A terrific mindset is to pretend you are trying to win your partner all over again.
7. Keep the flame burning. Keep your romance alive despite the chaos and craziness life can present from living in the midst of sheer reality. Resolve to offer up romantic suggestions for your partner's pleasure, even if only occasionally, like cooking her favorite meal when you know she's had an impossible day, or entice him into a bubble bath with you just for the fun of it. Little gestures like these from time to time can ensure that the flame you once had burns forever.
8. Spell out your terms of endearment. Call out the expectations for one another in the form of the "terms" of your relationship together. Put them in a contract, if you like. This contract will simply clarify and document those needs and wants that mean a lot to you. For example, though he typically runs late, your agreement might specify those times when he agrees not to be late; she may agree to keep her spending at a certain limit, though she typically has little restraint as she traipses through the mall. Discussing these boundaries, as well as your needs and wants, can prevent either of you from stepping over the line and causing irritation. It is often the disappointments (needs and wants, gone unexpressed) that bring down a relationship.
9. Renegotiate your contract. Your relationship will evolve, and your needs and wants will change right along with it. Once a year, it's a good idea to review, update, or revise your contract with each other -- whether it is verbal or written. Be mindful, however, not to allow such a "contract" to ruin your relationship.
1. Delineate "yours," "mine," and "ours." If you have finances that should be placed in each of these three categories (for example, you have an inheritance and he has a savings account he accumulated before the marriage, and you also have a checking account to which you both contribute), have an upfront conversation about those assets and what belongs to whom. Moreover, talk about your time away from "together" activities, like he wants to bowl with the guys on Tuesday nights and you want to attend your yoga class on Wednesday. Respect these important delineations. Doing so will make the relationship stronger.
2. Carve out time to be together. Sure, you're busy working and attending meetings, but how important are those things if your relationship falls apart? Make time to do things together that you both enjoy. This could be anything from grocery shopping to taking in a movie. Take regular vacations together -- at least a couple of long weekends and, better yet, a couple of long vacations (more than a weekend jaunt). Commit to a weekly date night and make it as unbreakable as that all-important staff meeting at work.
3. Take care of yourself. Spend time every day on your appearance and your physical well-being. Work out regularly, eat healthy, and stay fit. Not only will your partner like looking at you, but you'll feel better about yourself.
4. Make sure communication goes both ways. Many relationships fail because of misunderstandings. Effective communication skills are necessary if your relationship is going to survive. If there is a hint or vibe that your partner is disconnected or you are unhappy about something, do not ignore those signals or feelings. Approach your mate and suggest an open discussion. You may be frustrated, angry, or hurt and so may he or she, but always stay calm and reasonable. Your goal should be to resolve differences, and the only viable way of doing so is through open and direct communication.
5. Criticize gently. Don't judge too harshly. If you criticize, do so in the same way you would want others to criticize you. Be kind and considerate.
6. Never stop courting one another. Gifts, compliments, and a loving embrace go a long way, especially when they are a surprise. Send unexpected greeting cards, slap a Post-It note where you know your mate will find it, keep those flowers coming in a "just because" way. Treat your partner with the same courtesies you did when you were dating. A terrific mindset is to pretend you are trying to win your partner all over again.
7. Keep the flame burning. Keep your romance alive despite the chaos and craziness life can present from living in the midst of sheer reality. Resolve to offer up romantic suggestions for your partner's pleasure, even if only occasionally, like cooking her favorite meal when you know she's had an impossible day, or entice him into a bubble bath with you just for the fun of it. Little gestures like these from time to time can ensure that the flame you once had burns forever.
8. Spell out your terms of endearment. Call out the expectations for one another in the form of the "terms" of your relationship together. Put them in a contract, if you like. This contract will simply clarify and document those needs and wants that mean a lot to you. For example, though he typically runs late, your agreement might specify those times when he agrees not to be late; she may agree to keep her spending at a certain limit, though she typically has little restraint as she traipses through the mall. Discussing these boundaries, as well as your needs and wants, can prevent either of you from stepping over the line and causing irritation. It is often the disappointments (needs and wants, gone unexpressed) that bring down a relationship.
9. Renegotiate your contract. Your relationship will evolve, and your needs and wants will change right along with it. Once a year, it's a good idea to review, update, or revise your contract with each other -- whether it is verbal or written. Be mindful, however, not to allow such a "contract" to ruin your relationship.
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